Patriarchy has NO Gender. Patriarchy has no Gender??

“Yeh meri ladki nahi, ladka hai!” the moment a girl does something her parents are proud of!! why a girl has to be a son to make them proud?? “Ro kyun raha hai?? Ladki hai kya??” Why can’t he sob his emotions and yet remain the man of the house!! Any number of social reforms acts, and legal proceedings fail to change the thought process of the patriarchal society we live in.

It’s like living in a world where rules aren’t made to curb the real-world issues but the same world has got enough rules to define men and women.

She was a girl until she turned everyone else’s head towards her because she chose to wear a shirt paired with trousers, a cap and sports shoes out in the sun busy playing street cricket with boys of her colony while other girls of the society were busy in their dollhouses, meanwhile, Gupta Ji ki beti was into market pampering herself with a new hairdo and accessories, she was in the salon getting herself a boy cut trimmed hair. And from that day on, she was labeled, Tomboy!! Not a girl, of course not a boy either, another label!! A better tag than Gupta Ji ki beti btw!!

And yes!! While she was in the salon getting her hair trimmed, sharma Ji ka beta was in a different dilemma altogether, he was checking out a red T-shirt at the store to pair it with his recently bought purple sling!! Never gained enough courage to disclose, all this is for him not a surprise for her sister again.

One second!! Beti beta hai!! Patriarchy mein ye to likha hai!! But beta pink ya red nahi pehen sakta, ye kahan likha hai??

The moment she starts to earn, “beti beta hai!!”. When he spends on boots, “beta bigad kyun raha hai?”.

It is a matter of choice!!! Yeah! It is, but when does this choice turn subjective! Bas ye patriarchy mein nahi likha hai!! Or maybe kya likha hai! Kya nahi! is a matter of choice too!!

Why do we fail to accept her as a girl? If she earns, or she does not! If she marries, or if she decides not to! If she’s a tomboy or she remains the girl she wants to!! Oh No!! because then she’s an outdated behenji too!

Why can’t we just stop labeling and defining people and consider them fellow HUMANS!?

~Khushbu Bhardwaj

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Dr. Khushbu Bhardwaj

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